Punk in Finland

Bass Player looking for abusive band (san jose downtown)

I'm a bass player looking for a band. Under no circumstances should this band have any actual ambitions of playing bars, festivals, parties or weddings. The perfect band will be content to sit around the rehearsal studio playing lame prog-rock originals (or even better: thrash metal originals) that nobody actually wants to hear. Bonus points if we smoke pot and get drunk every rehearsal and sometimes forget to actually play our instruments.

If we do happen to play a gig, we should never accept money for it. Money just corrupts the art.

This band must include at least one guitarist who is convinced that all bass players are frustrated guitarists and will regularly insult both my intelligence and my playing. A really great example of this will make regular attempts to teach me how to play boogaloo patterns, major scales and minor arpeggios while questioning my dedication to my instrument. Also, regular snide comments on the professional quality equipment that I use would be just super.

A whiny keyboard player would help a lot as well. I'd prefer someone who is convinced that he is the only real musician in the band in any case, so it doesn't actually matter if he plays over my part badly. I won't mind, I'm just here to be insulted and abused in any case.

If the "singer" could round things out be being completely off key and out of time so he or she can tell me all about how wrong what I'm playing is that would be swell. Under no circumstances should he or she be a better singer than I am. That would just suck.

For the songlist we must avoid any songs that an audience might actually like to hear. Certainly nothing with a dance groove or regular radio airplay should be considered. Obscure, twenty minute tunes by obscure prog or metal bands would work. Or poorly written originals might be okay. Certainly less popular songs by artists from the sixties and seventies could be made to fit. If we are doing covers, the majority of the forty or so songs we play should be by two artists at most, preferably someone only the guitar player has heard of before.

All bass parts must be either quarter note roots (or sixteenth note roots for metal) and change no more often than every eight measures. Ideally, the bass line should be indistinguishable from the bass drum. Syncopation should be expressly forbidden.

Rehearsals should be randomly scheduled, poorly run and as unproductive as possible (see above about pot and drinking). Going through the same four songs for an entire hour and a half would be just awesome, especially if we do those same four songs the next rehearsal and the one after that. The other songs don't actually matter, we'll work them out at the (non-existent) gigs.

Does this sound like you, please, contact me immediately. My life is nowhere near miserable enough.

Kommunisti wrote:Nuori kitaristi/laulaja(?) etsii, tosissaan olevaa räkäistä punk bändiä. Tyylilaji mielellään jotain kakkahätä-77, pää kii ja nyrkkitappelun tapaista.
Stadista pitäisi päästä helposti treeneihin.
Laittakkaa viestii jos kiinnostaa.

Joku Tyttönen wrote:Oklahoma Hitchhiker: Hei, siinä ois jo melkein puoli bändiä kasassa. Voin kysyä siltä treenikseltä et voiks sinne tulla joskus muulloin treenaamaan, vähän epäilen kyllä mutta ainahan voi yrittää. Ollaan itekin just treenaamassa tota Breaking the law´ta, ite oon laulamassa siinä. Tiiätkö tai tietääkö joku muu treenikämppiä joensuusta? Itellä kyllä rahatilanne tällä hetkellä tosi vähissä et mihinkään kalliiseen paikkaan ei oo varaa.

Mistä ton verkkosukkahousun tavoittaa ja millasta musaa soittavat?

gasolino wrote:Löytyisiköhän Tampereelta jengiltä kiinnostusta lo-fi/melublues -proggiksen perustamiseen? Sellainen Pussy Galore/Suicide/Beefheart -tyylinen meininki olisi hakusessa.